another day alone; anxiety seeping through my skin and depression pressing against my ribcage, thorns spiralling around brittle bones that begin to ache in place of my already shattered heart and gods, I miss you and my skin betrays my secret in scars and my eyes join in with tears that burn and gods, I miss you.

- E.L.

damnit damnit damnit damnit damnit damnit damnit damnit damnit damnit damnit damnit damnit damnit damnit

Sixx:AM binge. The Heroin Diaries.
Should’ve bought whiskey. Damnit. Shop’s closed now. Guess coffee and cigarettes wiĺl suffice.

Ugh. Today was painful.

My reality is dying flowers and a cold embrace like Winter’s touch as she destroys all that Autumn could not A monochrome view only isolates me further as I try to keep on fighting but like Winter I am Cold and despised and empty; I am not vibrant like Autumn’s firey skin nor am I filled with hope like Spring’s promise of new beginnings or Summer’s joy; no, my reality is a slippery path as I try to keep myself strong and steady but as Spring erupts and my reality shatters I realise that I am ultimately alone

- E.L.

Just remember to breathe, put yourself at ease. In the morning you’ll be okay.

- E.L.

"Her mind is
racing, yet
she always
feels like she
finishes last."


Going back
to all the places
where I used
to know you,
those lost images
move through me
like fragile ghosts
and I loved you…



               and here

"When everyone else
rushed out as swiftly
as they rushed in, you
were the only constant.

Don’t blame me for
trusting you when there
has never been anyone
else worthy of such faith.

It has always been you."
last longer
than the taste
of feigned

Don’t bother
a bitter past
shared by
us both."
"Whenever I breathe
you in, my bones snap
right out of place.

The pain in my chest
tells me you are meant
for another, yet I want
to continue inhaling
more than anything."
"in another corner, i saw the sparks fly
from what those boys would later inhale,
pupils dilating till one of the green-eyed
boys was no longer one. i have a love-hate
relationship with silence, it grows when
i see you, and the moths fall to my stomach
like snow, when i am clinging to your
shoulders and the black of that boy’s eyes
delves into the green. when our lips
scream for each other but would not stop
because we can’t with my best friend
breathing out fruit-flavoured smokes, when
i make the guava embers come tumbling
down on purpose and you’re the only
one to blurt “clumsy” and i’m too busy
cleaning the mess of ashes. i love it for
all the times i look at you, mouth
empty and heart full, knowing you
know all i have to say, hate it for all the
times my ribs look for the moths when
they’re already in my mouth and you
are anywhere but next to me."
"I don’t need your
I’m sorry's and
it gets better's.

I need you to
tell me you’ll
hold my hand
and face this
hell with me."